The Bonds Tee

Dear Reader,

If you’re like me, then you know that there’s no better TV ad possible than one featuring slim, gorgeous young women dressed in nothing but their colourful underwear and performing complicated synchronised dance routines and group hand clapping face-offs.

Yet, something inside of me yearned for more from my Bonds commercials. Sure, the girls were hot, had great navels, long, shining legs, and cascades of beautiful hair that they tossed with abandon, but where was the narrative? Where was the character development?

Happily, Bonds’ latest TV spam is resplendent with narrative.

And an engaging narrative, too.

A group of young ppl put on their t-shirts, climb into a HZ Kingswood stationwagon, and take their dreams on the road.

There’s sexual tension, jealousy, angsty wistfulness, and tears before, after and during bedtime. It has it all.

And the blonde protagonist (who looks in some shots like Kylie Minogue in her Neighbours days) is a complex enough character for us to want to understand her journey. Is she manic depressive, or, worse, manically depressed? Or is she just not ‘pretty’ enough to get the boy she wants (whichever one that may be)?

It’s at least as good a narrative as The Adventures of Augie March, and without the reading-this-is-like-wading-through-excrement experience.

[No, i still haven't finished Augie March, dammit!]

Me, i’m partial to a t-shirt. In fact, when i’m not at Mister Widget’s Widget Manufactory, t-shirts are all i wear.

And pants. And flannel shirts. And underwear… you get the picture; it was a rhetorical thing.

Now i can lie in bed at night as i’m drifting off to sleep and picture myself driving along the unreeling nightways in that blue HZ Stationwagon with the young Kylie Minogue beside me, her feet up on the dashboard, writing in her journal as we roll on to an indeterminant future in our Bonds T-shirts.

Oh, life is grand.

Thank you, advertising, for giving me dreams worth having.

Yours,
Gullybogan