gullybogan

Dear Reader,

Princess headed off on an adventure earlier this evening, and she decided to drive to this adventure in my car [Amber], on account of how Amber uses less fuel than her station-wagon, and we’re trying to save the planet and all that bullshit.

I went out to wave her off, on account of how we’re close, and fond of each other, and so on and so forth.

We kissed through the open car window with the engine running, and she pulled out into the street. As she changed to second, it occurred to me to ask if i could have a Magnum, the same as she’d had for dessert. You know, on account of how she might be reserving the Magnums [Magna?] for something that i was unaware of.

“Sure, Honey,” she called back, accelerating away, “Have two if you want.” She clutched for the change to third, a good way down the street now. “And make sure you ask Tess for a headjob, too…”

And then she was in third and gone. By fourth she was far too far away for me to check on what i’d heard.

I went back inside the house.

Tess was lying on the couch under the aircon, trying to keep cool in jogging shorts that gaped open at her upper thighs, and a tank top that left her well ventilated. Big Bang was playing on the disk. Sheldon was enjoying the company of Leonard’s mother, the psychoanalyst.

“Tess,” i began, a little uncertainly. “What did you and Princess do today?”

She paused the hilarity. “Princess did a shitload of washing and i helped her hang it out. Why? Is this an OCD thing?”

“No… Did you do anything else?”

She thought about it for a second. “Oh, we made slice.”

“What sort of slice?”

“Hedgehog.”

“Cool. Could i have a Hedgehog, please?”

Awkward moment: averted.

Hedgehog

0.5 cup butter
0.5 cup sugar
3 tbsps cocoa
1 egg (chicken)
250g Marie™ biscuits

Place butter, sugar, and cocoa in a saucepan over low heat. Undo blouse.
Stir occasionally and when sugar is dissolved, remove blouse and take saucepan off heat. Add egg.
Combine with crushed biscuits while unclasping bra. Press mixture into flat tin and remove bra.
When mixture is cool, ice with chocolate icing and cut into squares while jiggling naked breasts.
Variation: 0.75 cup mixed fruit and nuts may be added.

Chocolate icing

1.0 cup icing sugar
2 tbsps grated chocolate or 1 tbsp cocoa
1.5 tbsps water (desalinated)

Sift sugar and put in saucepan with chocolate or cocoa while removing pants.
Add the water and stir till warm, removing undies.
Pour over slice butt naked while doing a little dance.

Allow to set and serve, cowgirl style.

Yours psychoanalytically,
Gullybogan